Do I Have To??

The last three months have been spent smooching chubby baby cheeks, trying to get laughs by making silly faces and sounds, play dates, snuggling and essentially being at baby's beck and call 24x7.  A never ending to-do list and continued lack of sleep keeps me on my toes.  Baby continues to grow (12 lbs, 14.5 oz and 24" tall at his 2 month check up) and learns new things every day. 

On Thursday I go back to work. 

While a part of me is looking forward to reconnecting with friends and adults in general... I'm dreading not getting to stare at Aiden's little face for those 40 hours a week.  I've teared up every time I've thought about it over the last week or so, and now it's really close.  I'm packing up stuff I know he'll need at day care, trying to figure out what I'm going to wear the first day back to work (knowing all eyes will check out where that baby bump used to be) and hoping I'll remember how to speak to other working professionals without slipping into baby-speak. 

So I guess I just need to figure out how to be ok with doing it all.  Have to work to provide for my baby's future... pay the bills, get to do fun stuff like baby music class and all of the things he's going to want to do when he gets older.  I think it's the right thing for me (even my grandma thinks so), but it's going to be extremely emotional.  Here's hoping I get through the first day in one piece!

Other randomness...

At 12 weeks old Aiden smiles, laughs, coos and drools, follows and bats at objects, is starting to grasp toys, can do a mini push-up on his tummy and is gaining better control over his head and neck.  He kicks like crazy and can support his weight on his legs with some help from mom or dad.  He's started sleeping longer/better since he moved into his crib.  He loves his giraffe, Christmas lights, the penguin mural in his room and that cutie who stares back at him in the mirror.

I love, love, love my baby and he's truly priority #1.  I had a dream last night that our house was hit by a tornado and I dove into the crib over top of the baby and we were spun outside and landed on the ground.  I broke just about every bone in my body, but the baby was safe and sound... then we got to be on Ellen... lol.  Maybe I have been watching too much daytime tv...

Could you deprive this face of anything?